How Zero Tortures Kaname for his birthday!
by DarkCrimsonShadowBlossom
Summary: Zero, and Rido torture Kaname on his birthday. Let the torturing Kaname begin!
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own anybody.

**Me and my friend silver-zenko-kitsune made up this story over the phone. I suggested it and she blurted out a lot of idea's. then she made fun of me for liking evil characters T-T ah well. Oh word of warning if your a Kaname Fangirl you might not want to read this…**

**Chapter: What people do for Kaname's birthday!**

Yuki and Zero walked, well technically Yuki dragged Zero, up to Kaname. "Hello Kaname! Happy birthday!" she squealed while blushing.

Kaname took both presents from them and ripped them open…which revealed one blue globe and one red globe. _This seems kinda corny… _thought Kaname.

"Do you like it?" said Yuki with a childish glint in her eyes.

"Of course I do Yuki!" he smiled his usual fake smile.

Zero turned his face away and just glared menacingly (Can't blame'em can ya?).

_Later on that night_

Kaname sat down with Yuki right next to him smiling. Zero was standing behind Yuki, like her protector. Toya and Shiki were nowhere to be seen. Kain was standing at the edge of the little group of people around him. Aido was standing behind Kaname with a scowl on his face and he was slightly blushing. "Kaname-sama I found this at the Headmaster's office!" said Yuki handing him a brightly wrapped box.

Kaname opened the box. As soon as he did a piece of paper from the little cannon in the box, whizzed over his hand. Aido saw it and caught it easily. _I wonder if I should give this to Kaname? _thought Aido, _Hm? It has my name..?_

The plain piece of folded up paper did indeed have Aido's name on it. He unraveled it and read the note:

_Dear Aido,_

_I'm sorry you had to find out this way but I think you must know. Your dear Kaname-sama has a Yuki shrine inside his closet. Go to Kaname's closet and go to the very back. There you will find a door hidden by his mounds of clothes. If you open that door it leads to a secret room. If you go into the room (Dodge the bunnies in that room, they're too frilly) turn to the left there is another door, there you will find the Yuki shrine. If you wish to thank me, just thank the dear lord up above._

_Signed,_

_None of your beeswax_

_What?! How could he have a Yuki shrine and not a Aido shrine!_ Aido thought as he stuffed the note into his pocket just in case. He eagerly exited the room while getting strange looks from Ichijo.

"I'm going to the bathroom. I'll be back don't worry Takuma-sama." said Aido respectively.

"Oh ok! Just don't stink up the bathroom too much Aido! Be back soon! We're going to slice the cake!" said Ichijo as he smiled very non-vampire like.

"Of course Takuma-sama." he said good bye and walked a few steps in the wrong direction, turned, "Er… Wrong way…"

He bolted in the _right _direction.

"That Aido! He's so happy for Kaname-sama that he forgot his way to the bathroom!" Ichijo chuckled quite loudly.

"Here Kaname! This is another present from me and Zero!" Yuki squealed as she handed him a small silver box.

_A couple hours ago_

"Zero! Come on! You have to give me the stuff for the charm bracelet! You want to make a good present don't you!" Yuki shouted as she focused on the home made charm bracelet.

The bracelet was a silver chain that Yuki bought herself. She knew Zero wouldn't put effort into Kaname's present (let alone get him something) so she made the present by herself.

Zero walked out of the room with all the accessories came from, "Here Yuki," he handed her some small silver bullets, "Put this on the bracelet."

"Um Zero? What are these?"

"They're…er… containers for Kaname's special stuff he wants with him all the time."

"OK!"

Yuki tried to put the "containers" onto the bracelet but was unsuccessful, "Zero this isn't working."

"Don't worry Yuki I have some wire." replied Zero.

The wire is a special wire where if you entangle another object with a clasp to it, it won't unclasp. It will stay almost super glued.

Yuki took the wire and entangled it around the silver chain, and out the silver bullets on.

"Wow! Thanks Zero!" she said smiling.

"Anything for you Yuki."

_Present time_

Kaname opened the box to reveal a silver chain charm bracelet.

"Wow thanks Yuki. Can you hook the clasp for me?" Kaname asked.

He noticed Zero turned his face away, the edges of his mouth slightly turned up. _Uh-oh! _thought Kaname as Yuki clasped his bracelet together.

"Wow! Thanks Yuki!," Kaname tried to move the bracelet to the other hand because the one hand that currently has the bracelet on it was his writing hand, "Uh Yuki…"

Kaname tried to remove his bracelet with regular strength, then super vampire strength and still the bracelet did not come off. He snuck a glance at Zero laughing his head off.

"That's weird… I wonder if I got it a size too small." Yuki thought aloud.

"I don't think that's the problem!"

"Kaname-sama! Come quick! Aido's in your secret room!" yelled Ichijo across the ballroom/ birthday party floor.

Kaname sped after Ichijo, Yuki after Kaname, and Zero after Yuki (You can't trust Kaname).

Kaname ran into his secret room, looked into the Yuki Shrine closet and saw….

AN AIDO SHRINE?!

"AIDO!?" Kaname raved.

Ichijo had Aido by the ear. Aido was also holding a baseball bat, and a trash bag, full to the tip.

"What's the meaning of this!"

"I want you to love me! Not Stupid Yuki! How can you love her and not me!" Aido sobbed.

"Because I'm not gay!"

"I don't know about that one! But say cheese!" said Zero snickering as he held up a camera to take a picture.

"Cheese!" they all said not paying attention to the camera.

_Click! Flash! _Zero looked at the picture and started bursting out laughing.

"all I want is for you to love me!" Aido whined.

"I'm sorry Aido but maybe you shouldn't be saying that…" intervened Ichijo.

"I can say whatever I want!" Aido knelt on one knee and took out a wedding ring, "Kaname-sama… will you marry me?"

Kaname was speechless. Zero took over and said in his best Kaname voice, "OF COURSE! I love you Aido!"

"Thank you! Thank you Kaname-sama! I will be the best husband ever!"

No one noticed the web cam in the left corner in the ceiling, taping everything that was happening.

_Aftermath_

About a couple of months later Yuki and Zero started dating, Aido married Kaname, and Toya and Shiki never showed up to the party until everybody was gone.

About that same time Kaname discovered Youtube. When he looked at the most watched video's he saw the little disaster that happened in his secret room.

12 days later he and Aido went into hiding.

12 days later after 12 days later Yuki and Zero got married.

Ichijo spread the whole you tube video around the school.

Headmaster Cross made it his scream saver so he can laugh his butt off when he turned on his computer.

13 days later Ruka had a breakdown and kissed Yagari

5 seconds later they got married.

12 days after that I married Kain.

**If you are a Kaname Fangirl we warned you! We told you so! We told you so! Warning: if you're a Kaname Fangirl you might not want to read the next chapter.**

**This story was made with a lot of help from my best friend silver-zenko-Kitsune so thank her too.**

**Next time: Bonus chapter what we'd do to Kaname.**

**Please review! *points to the shiny review button* just click it and it'll send you into a magical world of niceness!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own anybody cept fer me OC's!**

**This is the last chapter. It's kinda short so please don't complain.**

Misaki and her friend Katzue snuck gracefully into Kaname's birthday party. They knew he wouldn't be paying attention to the presents, so the two girls could easily switch the presents.

Misaki traded Ruka's present, a teddy bear that looked like her, with some firecrackers. Katzue traded Kain's present with 4 stakes, some garlic, a giant flashlight, and some holy water. They both didn't touch Zero's present because it was gold.

"This is so gonna rock!" Misaki smiled.

"Oh yes but there is one thing we have to do…" Katzue puzzled.

Misaki held up a Barbie doll, "Look! I magically found Kaname's Barbie doll her on the floor…" she snickered.

"Um… Why does it look like Yuki…?"

"I don't know, he's to Yuki obsessed for his own good."

"HE NEEDS TO GO FAR AWAY, DIG A HOLE AND DIE IN IT! HE ALSO NEEDS TO-"

Misaki clamped her hand over Katzue's mouth, "If you get us caught I will personally murder you."

Katzue scoffed and grabbed the Barbie doll. Misaki spontaneously pulled out some duct tape, and grabbed a ladder. "Alright! Now to put it up where everybody can see it!"

"Now to tape it up…"

_Several hours later_

The party started. As the music played they heard Misaki's voice, and Katzue's laughter.

"Hello fellow peoples! Please direct you attention to the big shiny object at the top of the banner's that say happy birthday Kaname!"

Everybody turned.

They saw a picture of Yuki and the Yuki Barbie doll that had a stamp next to it, with Property of Kaname on it.

"NOW WILL EVERY KANAME FANGIRL IN THIS ROOM PLEASE RUN AND TACKLE KANAME FOR MY ENJOYMENT!" Katzue's voice rang over the microphone.

That day Kaname learned to lock his secret room and to never make a Yuki Barbie doll ever again.


End file.
